you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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