Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
