is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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