# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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