Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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