also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
