We're like a lot better than the average bears
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
they're like a gay fantastic four
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
