The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
