It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
