never play flip cup with pint glasses
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize