Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
We had to coat check the pizza.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
