I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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