marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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