What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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