i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
