Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
