Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
