I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
And the cops told us we were all naked.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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