brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
