So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Randomize
