Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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