It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
