I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
