Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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