O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
