So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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