im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
