I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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