Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
