I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
