he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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