Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
He keeps bees of course he's weird
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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