Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
