Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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