I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
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