Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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