so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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