dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
You are a genius and a whore.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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