I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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