why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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