Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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