Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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