So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
