So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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