I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
