Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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