He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
