so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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