If i could tip my vagina, i would.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
