he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
This can only be settled by a dance off.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Randomize
