I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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